How To Win Friends and Influence People

Rule 1:Become genuinely interested in other people
" Do this and you will be welcome anywhere."
"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people then you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you."
"Ask questions to other people, questions that they would enjoy answering."
Reflection: This rule is a great rule because a person does not want to get to know us they want other people to get to know them before they get to know us. They want us to ask questions that are friendly yet not to friendly to the point were it gets weird. It is the greatest thing because if we start to get to know the other person then that person will want to get to know us better to have a better and more interesting chat. The greatest thing about this is that by following this rule we can create a better conversation that is two-sided instead of the regular one-sided conversations that we would normally have.
Quote:"If you want others to like you and develop real friendships keep this principle in mind BECOME GENUINELY INTERESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE."

Rule 2: Smile

"Actions speak louder than words,and a smile says, "I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you."

"You don't feel like smiling? Then force yourself to smile."

"It creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in a business, and is the countersign of friends."

Reflection: Smiling is a great way for people to start liking you because people start thinking wow this person might have a great life and if I am friends with them I might be able to have a happy life as well. It is also the best way to express yourself without having to communicate verbally because everybody knows what a smile means. It is also the best way to express yourself because the world knows that when a person similes that the person is having a great life. It is also a great way to uplift a persons mood because some people may need to see someone smiling to start feeling happy them self. It is also a good way to uplift a group of peoples spirit in case a traumatic accident has just occurred.

Quote: "Smile and forgive it's the only way to live."

Rule 3: Remember Names

"A man's name is to him as the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

"If you don't remember names, you are heading for trouble."

Reflection: This is a must to remember because if you don't remember the name of your friends or people you might want to befriend they could get mad at you and not want to stay friends with you. It is also a important thing to keep in mind because that way you can remember the person you are talking to and remember that persons likes. This is a good thing to keep in mind because people hate it when you don't remember there name. It is a good thing to remember so you don't make in error in the future and possibly ruin a beautiful friendship.

How to remember names:

Repeat the name.

Associate the name with something simple.

Tell the person that you forgot there name.

Spell out the name.

Keep records.

Rule 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

"If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener."

"Remember that the man you are talking to is a hundred times more interested in himself and his wants and his problems than he is in you and your problems."

Reflection: Being a good listener is a important thing because that way you can learn more about the person you are trying to befriend. It is also a important lesson to remember because you can you is it anytime in your life to try and learn new things about the people around you. It is a good thing to keep in mind that a person will talk to you more of you are interested in them more than yourself. It is also a good thing to keep in mind to always pay close attention to certain detail like there birthday, there kids name(if the have any), and other useful information. The best thing you can do is show that you are paying attention by asking questions frequently and also adding in your own opinion to certain matters. You can also keep eye contact at all time to show that your interest is focused sole on them and not anything else.

  

5 steps for active listening

1.Stay focused.

2.Really listen .

3.Allow for periods of silence.

4.Repeat the other persons words or paraphrase them. 

5.Understand the emotions behind the words.

Rule 5 Talk in terms of the other man's interest.

"The royal road to a man's heart is to talk to him about the things he treasures the most."

Reflection: This is important to keep in mind because a man will be more willing to talk to someone if you want to talk about there interest and not about your own. It is also  important to keep in mind that a man will be more calm and relaxed if you are talking about his interest more than your own. It is a good way to learn what the man your are talking about has in interest and hopefully some of his interest are similar to your own. You could also learn a lot about a man from his interest especially about how the act around other people and how his personality is. It can also help if you ask questions about his interest to see if you want to add his interest into your own interest.

Rule 6: Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely.

"The desire to be important is the deepest urge in human nature.

"Helping people feel important and appreciated works magic."

Reflection: This is important because if one feel important then they start to feel more confident in themselves. This in turn help us to learn more things from the person who feels important. We should act sincere because there are some people who will be able to tell if we are not being sincere which could ruin are afternoon with that person hounding us as to why we acted as if we cared. It is best if we show sincerity to other people because we don't know how hard there life has been. 

Ways to Make feel people important:

1. Compliment them.
2. Make there job seem better than you own job.
3. Make them feel like they are the center of attention.
4. Make them feel there is no one greater than them.
5. Give them reasons why they are the best.
6. 
   

Reflection: All of these pieces of advice are great ways of making friends because they show us how to make the people believe that we are interested in them. All of the advice that was given to us are the best pieces of advice that we can get because it will help us all through out are life and when we are looking for a job.